Street Smarts

This is a pretty comprehensive guide for relational know-how in my world.
Rules for interacting with someone on the street in Addis Ababa:
• Ignore everyone except
o beggars with babies or deformed limbs who approach you as you are waiting inside a line taxi, then give them a few coins or a banana
o foreigners you know
o Ethiopians who call you by name
o redats from mini busses who scream the name of your destination
Rules for interacting with someone on the street in Hawassa:
• Smile at everyone except
o boys ages 15-40
o prostitutes who laugh when they pass you
o employees at My Café (boycotting that place)
o people who call you by name at the Haile Resort (don’t let the young men in suits fool you: they are persistent in their efforts to ‘befriend’ foreign girls)
Rules for interacting with someone on the street in Adaba
• Ignore all men ages 15-40
o unless they live in your compound
o unless they work at Nyala café
o unless you have had shai/bunna at their parents’ house
o unless they are with a child under 10 years old
• Greet every child under 10 years old
o unless they have a rock in their hand
o unless they are holding an animal by its legs
o unless they are screaming
• Hug every child under 5 years old
o unless they are so muddy they will also get you muddy
o unless they are snotty
o unless they are one of two children you’ve spanked in public
• in that case, call them a duriye, “street boy”
• Smile to every woman
o If she is age 15-40 she will probably ignore you, but you should smile anyways
• unless she works at a school, then she will stop to kiss your cheeks and pat your head
• unless she works at one of 3 store shops you regularly visit, then she will invite you to “play” and sit on a stick while you talk to her and tell her “it is possible” that you might be able to bring her a laptop from America
• unless she lives on the road with all the sweet kids, then she will stand outside and wave or kiss your cheeks and pat your head
o If she is over 40, she will probably stop in her tracks, exclaim waynay, “woe is me,” and take 3 minutes to greet you and kiss you and bless your future children

• Test the waters with men over age 40
o If they are friends with Sertsu, greet them warmly
o If they work at one of three stores you regularly visit, talk to them
o If they are in a large group, ignore them
• unless one of the members of the group works at
• a school
• the education office
• or is the mayor

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s